We go on with our lives without paying much heed to how we interact with people. The most successful people however master this art because they know if you want to walk fast walk alone; but if you want to walk far, walk together.
Biggest takeaways from Dale Carnegie’s masterpiece “How to Win Friends & Influence People“
- Genuine interest in people will take you a long way: Just imagine how much we’re consumed by our thoughts. One after the other. our life, our problems, our goals, and our ambitions. Everything we do is focused on us, then how on earth can we expect others to not be the same and be interested in us? The key to learning this art is to be genuinely interested in knowing others. Everyone loves to talk about themselves. Recognize this and be willing to listen, show genuine interest and that would make them interested in you. When you listen you show that you care and that will help them ease with you. We love feeling important, so does the person who you’re talking to. Let them talk, listen carefully this lets you know them better and makes them feel important.
- Admit your mistakes first: When you know you have made a mistake, the best thing to do is come clean with it. No matter how big or small the mistake accept it. Arguing or defending why you did what you did is the last thing you would want to do. Accepting you’re wrong is not going to hurt you. In fact, in most cases, it will earn you the respect of the person you’re dealing with. Remember only the strongest people have the courage to accept their mistakes.
- Avoid Arguing at all costs: Single biggest mistake I always repeated in my life. Arguing with people to try to get them to agree with your way of thinking is only going to make their view stronger irrespective of what might be the correct way. Ideas we strongly believe in associate us with a certain tribe and we take pride in them. Trying to change someone’s strongly held beliefs is tough and arguing is the last thing to help you. Instead always start with the common belief you have with the person, appreciate it, and then make them think about your idea. Do not force your idea on them, put it in the form of a question and ask them their views on the idea. Make them believe that the idea has come from them and you’re more likely to get them to agree with what you want to.
Fun fact to end with this book was first published in October 1936, and still remains in print. That is more than seven decades and has sold more than 30 million (3 crores) copies worldwide.